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Tuesday, January 5, 2010

All’s Quiet on the Western Front


Lydia Nolan

©July 14, 2009




Outside it’s pitched black. Sounds I hear

Are occasional howls, trees shivering in the breeze —and me....

Its midnight: I hear my thoughts, and my courage wanes

Until I look up and see the stars so brazen, so brave

Watching me, caring for me in cold, snowy earth....



I left the Christmas lights on around the patio—the boundary

That seems to be weakening in the wind. They flicker, too

pantomiming the stars—waning, unlike that great moonlight...

How do I reinvent my self? I was thinking...and now it’s near daylight.



When all my Youthful years have passed me by—

When all my dilligence in youth causes me to sigh—

When all my confidence in ignorance is shamefully splayed—

I feel tired. The dark is dubious--the clouds hide the stars, and rolls into the unknown....

A blanket of stars had come forth last night; intensified, as though they were focused on me.

For a few moments they did not seem to be blinking with disbelief, but instead

They appeared to be intense in seeing me, and then they enlarged, as if to say:


"Don’t fret! We will light your way; God! —will surely light your way..."




I admit I never really pray about my sorrows— but last night I was screaming to be heard, inside my Self.

Screaming: “Yes! Help me, won’t you please? Tell me, how do I reinvent myself?” And then the tears

burned hot on my cheek and I closed my eyes, and the memory of the stars return to me in my mind's eye;

blinking as the moon was bright before it took its rest...



I much prefer to listen to the stars, the skies, the wind, and the trees

Until I’m by my self, so late passed midnight— and then I hear me breathe.

I realize that I am the only one here, so I must listen to me.



“Let go,” I tell my Self, “Do not long to mirror the models.”

And I see my own reflection on the glass sea,

“Try and rest easy tonight—" I smile at my Self, respectfully...

I Listen intently to the quiet; I look out into nothingness, and then I hear Peace calling to me,

Fear is trying to muffle the sound, but Peace speaks louder:



"All’s quiet on the western front tonight—" I heard...

"This Journey is surely for eternity—" I heard...

"Only, just believe—and reach without fear"

"Then you will reinvent yourself" I heard...

That is what I heard, so I went inside to rest.


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