Saturday, October 16, 2010
Name Changes mean Change...
I'm changing my name.
Who cares whether it's legal, illegal, sane or not; it's done.
I have used at my http://www.internationalbookscafe.com/ site the initial L, with which I began my name, to shorten it's length, and add another: my ancestral name from afar.
Here is the full name as it appeared in IBCafe previously:
However, I decided to make some changes to reflect some major changes in my thinking. It isn't anything monumental except that I feel differently than a week ago.
I will now and forever use the name
Elle Nolan, still pronounced like the letter L.
There is rationale for my madness.
First, and the least notable is: The letter L seems too impersonal, and I'm a very personal kind of gal, so I did not want to use L when someone responded to me, as I felt I was keeping a certain distance to them when I saw it posed in the heading of their responses through email. Secondly, the letter L is pronounced Élé in Spanish AND Italian, to which I being Latin, relate, but I wanted it to appear as a full name and not an initial. Hence, the name "Elle," which can still be pronounced L, but now it appears as a name in itself.
The last and most important reason is the change in my personality. Sometime ago I experienced a bad heartbreak: a broken relationship, a loss so wounding that if I did not do something drastic it would be hard to release myself from the wound and so only through some remakable revelation I decided, can a healing begin. I had a remarkable revelation about myself (what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger) and now I want to heal. Again: hence, the name change.
I am never going to be an impersonal person; that's not me; it never was, and it never will be. I love deeply, I feel intensely, and I listen passionately to others as well as my own heart. I live so deep in a moment that when it passes it leaves a long trail like a falling star, before it finally dissipates (if it really ever does dissipate; I believe that it remains arguably, forever in the memory like a lesser bright star, but a star nonetheless.)
So I hope everyone can change their view of my name along with me. I am Elle Nolan. The last name dropped so that I would no longer confuse the aspiration I once had to bring fame to the ancestral name when I wrote my first book. I want to have the surname I am legally bound to, for a number of personal reasons. If I were to change it ever again, it would have to be Elle Nolan-.....
So now, let me introduce you to Elle Nolan, the Writer.